Start off Paczki Day early and take a tour of the city
There is plenty to do on Paczki Day. Come hungry and you can enter a paczki eating contest at PLAV Post 10 starting at noon.
By Ian Perrotta
With so much to do and just a few hours to get it all done, here is our Paczki Day activity guide.
At 7 a.m., start the day off right with breakfast at the Loyal Order of the Moose Lodge #1670 (9421 Conant). The “little lodge with a big heart” will be serving egg sausage soufflé and fresh, homemade kielbasa, and all proceeds will be donated to the Hamtramck Goodfellows.
When you’re finished head over to the 13th Annual Paczki Palooza at New Dodge Lounge (8850 Jos. Campau), where the party also starts at 7 a.m. but goes much later. Drink a Bloody Mary and take shots of Jezy on live TV before most people are out of bed, and stick around for live entertainment by Polish Muslims, Jo-Town, The Party, and DJ Blayde.
Throughout the day the bar will feature Miller and Miller Lite specials, Jagermeister specials on “sluts” and “bombs,” special appearances by The Miller Girls, and something advertised simply as “beads galore” — whatever that means. There will also be a men’s “Hot Legs” contest and an acoustic after party with Tony Paris.
At 8 a.m., 7 Brothers Bar (11831 Jos. Campau) opens up and invites you to join in the celebration. As their Facebook page says, “the tradition of feasting and indulging in true decadence is one that cannot be ignored, so whether you’re making a stop on your long day of bar hopping or saving your paczek just for us, we want to be a part of your Paczki Day.
“Enjoy paczki in your shots of Jezy! Wear a Mardi Gras mask! Flirt with strangers! Dance like you’re giving it up for lent! No matter what, enjoy yourself for one of Hamtramck’s best celebrations of the year.”
An hour later at 9 a.m. The Polish Sea League (2601 Edwin) opens for a complimentary breakfast and paczki, and throughout the day there will be drink specials and performances by Jo-Town and DJ Escalade.
From there head on over to Whiskey in the Jar (2741 Yemans), where “debauchery begins at 10am-ish, so get your lives in order, call in sick both Tuesday AND Wednesday, and get your babysitters lined up and your Designated Drivers on speed dial, because it’s gonna be a day you won’t want to forget — if you can remember it.”
The mayhem that is also known as “The Polish St. Patrick’s Day” kicks into high gear in the afternoon when The Kielbasa Kings and Polish Muslims take the stage in the tent behind the bar. To quote the Facebook page, “As your OFFICIAL Paczki Day BarTENTers, Miss Amy Baldiga and The Mikey will be in fine form throwing boozezes at your face and helping to cure your sobriety though the use of ‘The Shot-Ski’ and other mildly inappropriate tactics.”
By noon you’ll probably be getting hungry again. At PLAV Post 10 (11824 Jos. Campau) the original paczki eating contest is back at 12 p.m., as are the drink specials and Polish food.
Get your name on the “Paczki Cup” or grab a “Polish Slider” and then stick around for Polka Floyd at 1 p.m., Danny D at 3 p.m. and the Polish Muslims at 6 p.m.
Also starting at noon, Detroit Threads (10238 Jos. Campau) hosts its “Fattin’ OUT!” party, featuring several DJs and specials on music and clothes. And it would be a surprise if there wasn’t something going on a few doors down at Lo & Behold! (10022 Jos. Campau), too.
You can polka all day long on Paczki Day.
Towards the end of the day — when everybody else is getting off work and eager to join the action — head on over to Small’s Bar (10339 Conant). Though it is also open at 10 a.m., beginning at 4 p.m. you can check out live music acts including East Side Elvis and Polka Floyd. And don’t forget to try a “Paczki Bomb,” which are just $3 while they last.
There are also plenty of other bars to explore throughout the day. The Mars Bar of Detroit (10001 Jos. Campau) is one of the classiest bars in the city, and Celina’s Sports Bar (11667 Jos. Campau) is one of the cleanest and will have Club V dancers at 9 p.m.
For a more homey time, check out Tight Fittin’ Jeans (12002 Jos. Campau) or Suzy’s Bar (2942 Evaline), which are both owned by some of the nicest people on the planet. Head Coach Bar (12001 Conant), Baker Streetcar (9817 Jos. Campau) and Hippo’s (11641 Conant) are also great local spots.
